If I had a clone to accompany me
I'd probably spend even more time in my own company
And we could trade off who goes to work and who gets the day off
I'd be the king who shared a throne
If I had a clone

And if I had a clone there would always be
Someone who enjoys doing all the same things as me
Someone who likes fun, someone who'd laugh at all of my bad puns
No, I'd never be alone
If I had a clone

Well, I could go to bars and be my own wing-man
Harmonise with myself when I sing and
Play with myself (wait, what?) at video-games (oh, right)
And we could freak out our friends with 'The Transported Man' trick
There would never be any conflict
Because we'd think the same
If I had a clone I'd be okay

If I had a clone I could finally see
What everybody else sees when they look at me
But what if I find that, in fact, I'm not such a nice guy?
The illusion would be blown
If I had a clone

Well, I could go to bars and be my own wing-man
Harmonise with myself when I sing and
Play with myself (here it comes) at video-games (there it is!)
And we could freak out our friends with 'The Transported Man' trick
There would never be any conflict
Because we'd think the same
If I had a clone I'd be okay
If I had a clone we'd be okay